On The Road
by: Bill Oetinger 1/1/2012
Looking on the bright side
We’ve had another chat list discussion recently about bikes and cars and how we get along out there on the roads. It began with the latest iteration of a “bikes-vs-cars” article in our local paper. With more and more cyclists in Sonoma County all the time, this continues to be a hot-button issue, at least the Editor at the paper thinks it ought to be. So they print these pieces on a fairly regular basis and they all sound approximately the same: a few quotes from drivers about how those darn cyclists don’t respect the rules of the road and a few quotes from cyclists about being hassled by rogue drivers, with the reporter taking a “fair and balanced” middle ground on the topic.
It’s almost as if the Editor assigns this topic to each new cub reporter as a rite of passage: “Crank out a piece on bikes-vs-cars and if you don’t stink up the joint too bad, we’ll let you cover City Hall or a murder or something really fun.”
In this case, the writer fired off an e-mail to me ahead of time as part of his research for the piece. I sent him to a couple of my BikeCal columns that had dealt with the same general subject. He didn’t quote me directly in the article, but I could see he’d read my copy and incorporated that point of view into the final product. And in fact he called me up afterward to talk about it and confirmed he had done so and found the information helpful.
In general, it was a good article, with both sides getting their ink, and the take-away from it all being that although we have our little frictions out there, for the most part we do get along pretty well. Most of the folks who chimed in on our bike chat list agreed, although as always, there were those who found something to complain about: some subtle nuance or spin that seemed to favor the other guy too much. I complained that it was more of the same old same old that we’ve seen so often before, but others said no, it’s good to keep the topic on the front burner (or in this case, on the front page). We need to remind one another--drivers and riders--that we are both out there and both entitled to our share of the road; to be courteous and patient, etc.
I told the reporter that I am always concerned that articles of this sort bring the crackpot bike haters out from under their rocks to spew some vitriol on the newspaper’s website. I’ve seen enough of those foaming rants in the past that I never even scan the reader-response submissions anymore. But in this case, the writer told me there hadn’t been a single nasty response to the article in the week or so following its publication. That must be a first (in my subjective assessment). Either the article was indeed fair and balanced enough that no one felt a sense of grievance or--maybe--we are at last getting to that new and hoped-for better place where we really can get along out there.
I’m not such a pollyanna that I believe we really have arrived at that peaceful paradise where we do get along all the time. I fully expect to have more little fractious interactions with drivers who take exception to my being on their roads. But I don’t want to grumble and grouse about those less pleasant encounters today. I’m writing this on December 28th, right smack between the holidays and part way through the twelve days of Christmas. So in the spirit of the season, with goodwill extending in all directions to all men, even those in large pick-ups, I want to testify about how many nice interactions I have with people out on the road when I’m on my bike.
It’s an unfortunate quirk of human nature that we tend to remember the ugly, unpleasant moments more vividly and with more emotional loading than we remember the nice moments. Why we’re wired that way, I don’t know. Perhaps it’s our inner child, feeling vulnerable and insecure, who seizes on those little hurts and cherishes them. Perhaps it’s some atavistic monkey-survival thing: that the good moments may make us feel better but the bad moments might get us killed. In any event, we do recall those nasty encounters with lunatic drivers much more intensely than we recall a wave and a smile from another driver.
But all in all, I think even the crankiest cyclist will admit that the vast majority of our interactions with other people while we’re on our bikes will be at worst neutral and every so often quite positive, with just a thin sliver of the total given over to the hostile encounters. I’ve been thinking about this a bit lately and have been reminding myself to notice the nice moments and hold onto them, rather than obsessing about the frustrating or frightening ones.
I notice farm workers on tractors: they see me coming along the road, next to the vineyard, and they turn off the sprayer they’re pulling until I’ve gone by. Likewise with the neighborhood landscape workers, who stop their leaf blowers or string trimmers until I’ve passed. I notice the walkers on the bike trails and road shoulders who make sure their dogs are under control as I approach. None of these actions is an indication that any of the people is glad to see me or is my best friend. In fact, in all cases, I may be just a minor inconvenience for them. But in spite of that, they’re practicing the little acts of courtesy and accommodation that make a society work. And if that little courtesy is accompanied by a smile or a nod in my direction, then it becomes an acknowledgement that we are both part of the same community, the same family. It’s the equivalent of namaste: “the spirit in me honors the spirit in you.” Such acts of respect and communion ennoble both of us.
There are more overtly friendly interactions too. A smile or wave or a cheerful salutation from a walker or even from a driver. Or the even more extrovert thumbs up or horn tootle from a driver (who is probably also a cyclist). And if I meet someone while I’m standing still, such as stopping for a snack by a store, they may enquire about my route or about my bike. Or we may just work our way through a little small talk about the weather…agreeing that it’s a great day to be out for a walk or a ride. There are a lot of genuinely friendly, affable, chatty folks out there, and unless you’re being a grumpy old curmudgeon, you’re probably going to meet some of them along your way. Then there are the people I never meet who still have a positive impact on my day…for instance, the home or business owners who have a water source close to the road and who put up a sign saying, “Cyclists welcome.” I can think of a few of these along the roads I ride every week.
I can’t begin to recall and itemize all the pleasant interactions I’ve had with my fellow humans while I was in bike mode. Those little moments just flow over and around us like water over a rock in the stream. They are the humble, commonplace, everyday moments that add the texture and color to our lives. And like all the other commonplace elements, they most often go unregarded and unremembered, no matter how precious they might really be.
I don’t make New Year’s resolutions, but if I did, I would make one this year to be more aware of those positive moments; to hold them close and to repay them in kind. My grandmother used to serve the breakfast milk in a little ceramic pitcher with these words on it: “Be like the sundial; count only the sunny hours.” Sappy and sentimental, sure. But not too bad as a working plan for the new year, especially when it comes to our encounters with the rest of the world while we’re on our bikes.
May your new year--and all of the bike rides in it--be filled with pleasant moments and friendly encounters and all the good things that make life worth living.
Bill can be reached at srccride@sonic.net